When you respect the Father, you Fear the Father and blessed is the man that Fears God.

Strange circumstances, strange trials, tribulations, and hardships for my wife and I but I know they are all for a reason.

My mother had a stroke, my grandmother a heart attack, and the list goes on and on.

God is pruning me and making me grow in a new direction, his direction, and there is an intoxicating love that comes out of knowing he is in control.

May has been amazing so far in ways I never really looked forward too but now that I am serving God in new ways its really liberating.  I am branching out and evangelizing more and starting to really press into God deeper and leaving old worries, concerns, and problems along the way.  I don’t worry anymore about things I cannot control, but instead I have finally learned to place my worries at the foot of the cross.  Just leave them there, and let them go.

I am learning to be kind, even to those that use me. It’s hard to be kind to the credit card company when they stick you for an extra $123.90 when they finally cash your check you sent two months ago and the $123.90 was interest! You really get upset when you come home and see your UPS box left in the rain. It seems like I am tested daily now on being kind to the very people that its hard to be kind too. I hope you don’t mind that I share my little struggles with you guys.

Things I was worried about last month do not concern me anymore and I feel closer to Jesus than I ever have before.  I am so thankful for my church family, people that love me, and my three wonderful kids who keep me busy from 5-10PM nightly!

I know that God is preparing me for something, and I am trying to be patient, learn to wait, and most importantly learn to listen.

Thank you so much for your support over the years.  April has been an amazing month.  Change in the air. Problems going away.

Good for the ministry, good for the office, and good for the Kingdom of Heaven.  Jesus is slowly pulling me out of the muck and into the sunshine of his everlasting, unforgiving, and always there love.  I am so thankful for a defeated enemy.  God fights the battles for you if you let him.

I have changed so much just in the last 6 months.

Let me give you this example.  I was in a hurry to hit Safeway at 9am this morning on the way into the office and I cruised all around the parking lot several times looking for a spot for my truck.  After almost ten minutes, I realized that the ONLY spot available was not much of a spot.  Some truck had pulled into the spot the wrong way and was “over the line” about two whole feet on my side, and had parked at an angle with no consideration for anyone else.

I had no choice so I parked there.  Because of this truck, my truck was over the “other guys” line.

When I came out with my groceries twenty minutes later, the truck that had parked wrong was gone, and every one was glaring at me. “Is this your truck?” they claimed. As a result, there had evolved a small parking jam because someone was trying to get into the same spot that the truck was in at the wrong angle, and everyone saw me parked and it “appeared” that I was the one that had parked wrong,  and as a result everyone was angry with me and I met disgruntled people when I arrived and they were shouting out obscenities to me.

I did something that I had never done in that situation.  I apologized and asked them for forgiveness. I slowly went into my truck and left with a smile.

Ya know, God is teaching me….

Spring is the time of new beginning. Old is gone; new has come. Where dead figs once lay like residue, fresh blossoms begin to appear. How awesome!

I can report that I really feel as though the trials are lifting. The more I push, the more I humble, the more I admit it’s me, the more I say “less of me, more of you” the trials fade, the sales increase, and I can feel his love.

I take spring as a reminder from God that He loves new beginnings. When everything feels dead and dull and barren, God gives life. I love this about Jesus and I hope and pray that I maintain my pledge to try and be a good example of Christ.

Now, as I look out the window and see the grass’s green growing in its vibrancy, the trees budding, and finally, after a long Washington winter, the sun shining on all in sight I’m reminded of God’s faithfulness. Like spring, God never fails to show up. He’ll never forsake us. With this thought, my heart swells. He has corrected me, taught me, changed me, and now I feel him loving me.

Today, let us be reminded of his sovereignty. His leadership is perfect.  And, for this, I will worship Him and tell others about him. Whether musical success or failure is around the corner, this is about Jesus for me. Through my music, my life, my success and my failure: “May the Lamb that was slain receive the reward of His suffering.” (The Moravians)

P

I wanted to share with all of you about trials and tribulations. We know the scripture that says “Count it Joy brothers when you fall into trials” and I can’t say how true this is. It does not say “if” but when we fall into trials.

Without trials where would we be? How would we learn to change. My elders, teachers, and Pastor’s have drilled this into my brain since I was first saved almost 8 years ago but I did not truly understand their teachings until I fell into what can only be described as the most painful trial of my life.

All in two weeks I had fall upon me false accusations from a dishonest ex contractor I hired , no sales at work for months, my mother had a stroke and fell at Costco and is now paralyzed, and my grandmother had a heart attack three day’s later in San Diego and a horrible personal matter took place in February that has never happened to me before.  In the back-drop of all of this my trucks broke down, leaking faucets at the house and to add insult to injury my Credit cards went missing causing us undue stress because we had to call them all in stolen.

Leaning over my mom’s hospital bed at 3am in Seattle at the hospital and stroking her arm watching the heart machine going blip….blip…blip….my wife called me in a panic about a personal crisis that was devastating. Was this ever going to end?  It seemed like all was lost and everyday something new would happen to us that would require hours out of the day to fix and or repair. We did not want to even wake up out of bed each morning for fear.

My life was falling apart before my eyes.    Man, was I in something deep. I huddled with my Pastor, the elders, and my family  and I reached out to God FOR REAL this time.

In one month my life had changed.

This is an excerpt from my personal diary that is private. I wrote this at 1am on February 27th.   This was at the peak of my trial:

“As I write this on February 27th at 1AM I tell you that I can feel the Holy Spirit burning my face. It’s like I took a Niacin pill and am sitting in the tanning saloon with no fan. I have never felt so close to God than I am right now and I want you to know Satan that no matter what you do to me I will serve only Jesus Christ of Nazareth and no one else.”

I am proclaiming in the name of Jesus that at my worst I felt closer to the Holy Spirit than I ever have in my entire life and as soon as the Spirit knew I had offered myself to God 100% and humbled myself and admitted that I needed him I was released. I felt it slowly lift. The covering of Christ came and wings of Golden soft warmth held me.  I knew I was loved and I immediately began to reflect on why this had happened to me. Why had God allowed Satan to hammer me so hard.

I felt in the Holy Spirit that God wanted me to learn to be a better example of Christ. This was confirmed over and over and over again over the next few days by friends, Pastors, Elders, and family.

You see, I called myself a Christian but I was still joking around.  I was still watching the wrong reality programs on TV.  I was still doing a slew of things that when other people saw me doing these activities they may have questioned Christians.

No, I don’t drink anymore and no I don’t smoke but If I am to evangelize I need to be a PERFECT example. I need to be Christlike even around my friends and when I am alone.  Especially when I am out with my family and NOT just when I am at church, at bible study, or with my “church crew”.

Jesus I promise you that I will be a good example from here on out Lord and I will try to never make you look bad again. I have learned Lord!

I need to be a Good example

Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance.

Disobedience is caused by rebellion and distrust of God. To be disobedient is to yield to self-will instead of surrendering to God and desiring His will in all things.

Matthew 22:36-38

“‘Teacher, which is the greatest commandment in the Law?’ Jesus replied: ‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with your entire mind.’ This is the first and greatest commandment.’”